A change of pace today. I am going to give politics and those who practice it the week off. They aren’t going anywhere and I am tired of them and their blather. Instead, let’s talk about love, Love? Yes, love.
Dr. Bill Burch, my spiritual guide and Preacher Extraordinaire, whose efforts to save my sorry soul have been commendable but remain a work in progress, recently broached the subject in his weekly post.
He said, “Life is judged by a simple question, ‘Did I love well?’ At the end of each day as we drift off to sleep, we ask, ‘Did I love well today?’ At the end of our lives as we drift off to death, we ask, “Did I love well?”’ How do we respond to that? As we drift off to sleep, do we say, “I’m going to bed mad and I’m going to wake up mad and I’m going to be mad all day.” Or, as we drift off to death, do we say, “I wonder if all that stuff I got mad about over the years was really that important?”
My mother had an ironclad rule about love. The last words she and my dad spoke before going to sleep at night were, “I love you.” Nothing after that. If either were to pass away during the night, the other would remember the last thing they ever said to each other.
We sometimes toss the term around like a Frisbee. We love certain TV shows. We love weekends. We love football. We love cooking out. As for me, I love banana pudding, the University of Georgia and anything Ray Charles Robinson, of Albany, Georgia, has ever sung, especially Georgia on my Mind.
But love is deeper than that. In the famous passage in 1st Corinthians, the Apostle Paul says that love is patient and kind, not jealous or proud or selfish or easily angered. That is real love.
Speaking of love, it is mentioned 574 times in the New International Version of the Bible. Those of us who identify ourselves as of the Christian faith would do well to read closely, including Christ’s admonition to love others as you love yourself. Easy to say. Hard to do. According to my mail, some self-proclaimed Christians are still at the eye-for-an-eye stage.
The author and theologian C. S. Lewis identified four types kinds of love: Romantic, Affectionate, Friendship and Unconditional, or Agape. Some other sources slice love up into 7 parts, including ego, or self-love, a trait most commonly exhibited by our intrepid public servants, including an occasional President of the United States. (Oops! I think I said no politics today. My bad.)
I didn’t always treat the subject as seriously as I should. It was my very first class in college at what was then Georgia State College, now Georgia State University, in Atlanta. Fall quarter. Freshman English. 8 AM. An environment begging for some levity.
Somehow, the subject was love although to this day I’m still not sure how love fit in among conjugating verbs and present participles. Frankly, I didn’t love either one, especially at 8 o’clock in the morning.
The professor said love could not be simply defined. I said yes it could and belted out “Love is a Many Splendored Thing.” The class thought it was hilarious. I did, too. Not surprisingly, the professor was not amused and I was asked to gather my belongings and leave.
Great. One week in school and I am about to be out of school and trying to explain to my parents that, unlike my strait-laced brother who had sailed through college, I didn’t last a month. Fortunately, a little humility on my part and a lot of forgiveness on the professor’s part and I was allowed back in and decided to stick to conjugated verbs and participles, past and present, and leave the jokes to the professionals.
So here I am all these years later back on the subject of love. Wiser and more mature than the jokester in freshman English. And more serious. Today I am wrestling with the questions proposed by Dr. Burch. Did I love well today? If not, why not?
Composers Hal David and Burt Bacharach wrote, “What the world needs now is love, sweet love. Not just for some, but for everyone.” I agree. We need to focus on loving well. After all, Love is a Many-Splendored Thing. And I love that we have had this conversation.
You can reach Dick Yarbrough at dick@dickyarbrough.com or at P.O. Box 725373, Atlanta, Georgia 31139
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